Recently we have been learning about the two main styles that people use when communicating with one another. If your words are your words, if you say what you mean and mean what you say, then you’re probably a Direct Communicator. If on the other hand your communication is not found in the words you use, but in your expressions, body language, and tone of voice, then you’re probably an Indirect Communicator.
These two different languages of communication that we speak is part of the reason why it can be so difficult to understand other people, and to be understood!
Think about it-an Indirect Communicator really needs the people around him/her to read the non-verbal signs of what s/he is trying to communicate-which can be HUGELY frustrating for Direct Communicators, whose natural tendency is to rely on words and words alone!
Think about it-an Indirect Communicator really needs the people around him/her to read the non-verbal signs of what s/he is trying to communicate-which can be HUGELY frustrating for Direct Communicators, whose natural tendency is to rely on words and words alone!
The good news is this CAN be overcome, through taking the time to understand your communication style and understanding the communication style of the people around you.
The bad news is in addition to communication styles, I believe there are also three distinct relational styles that we all have, that govern how we connect and engage with the people around us! And, just like with our communication styles, our relational styles can create problems as people with different relational styles try to connect with one another.
If you’ve ever tried to speak to someone who doesn’t speak your language, you know how frustrating it can be!
Over the next few weeks I’ll be talking about these three relational styles to give you a better understanding of why you are the way you are and why the people around you are the way they are. Knowing this will revolutionize the way you connect with others.
Let me give you an example:
Recently my wife and I were having a conversation-and it became clear to me that she wasn’t happy with how I was reacting and responding to her. The funny thing is I thought I was handling it very well…and according to my relational style, I probably was. But because my wife is wired differently than I am, it didn’t come across very well.
And, as you can imagine when my wife wasn’t reacting favorably to me, it upset me, which derailed our conversation.
Thankfully, once cooler heads prevailed, we were able to deconstruct what happened and much of what caused us problems was rooted in our different relational and communication styles. Once we came to that conclusion, we were able to resolve the tension….sort of. (=
Join me next time to learn about the three distinct relational styles….and to determine which relational language you speak!
The bad news is in addition to communication styles, I believe there are also three distinct relational styles that we all have, that govern how we connect and engage with the people around us! And, just like with our communication styles, our relational styles can create problems as people with different relational styles try to connect with one another.
If you’ve ever tried to speak to someone who doesn’t speak your language, you know how frustrating it can be!
Over the next few weeks I’ll be talking about these three relational styles to give you a better understanding of why you are the way you are and why the people around you are the way they are. Knowing this will revolutionize the way you connect with others.
Let me give you an example:
Recently my wife and I were having a conversation-and it became clear to me that she wasn’t happy with how I was reacting and responding to her. The funny thing is I thought I was handling it very well…and according to my relational style, I probably was. But because my wife is wired differently than I am, it didn’t come across very well.
And, as you can imagine when my wife wasn’t reacting favorably to me, it upset me, which derailed our conversation.
Thankfully, once cooler heads prevailed, we were able to deconstruct what happened and much of what caused us problems was rooted in our different relational and communication styles. Once we came to that conclusion, we were able to resolve the tension….sort of. (=
Join me next time to learn about the three distinct relational styles….and to determine which relational language you speak!
