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How Do We Go From "I Do" to "I Don't"?

6/5/2013

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A modified version of this blog was originally published in 2008 for a marriage ministry blog. At the time I was a property manager for an apartment community in Colorado and, along with Kacy, led the marriage ministry in our local church. 
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A couple of days ago I received an email from one of my best friends and had a conversation with one of the residents who live at the community that I manage. My friend was lamenting on how he has not yet been able to find "the one".

I had told him how my weekend was composed of doing laundry, watering the yard, trying to tackle the items on the "honey do-list", spending time with my daughter and playing more than a few games of Yahtzee with my wife. He said that he hoped one day to be able to have weekends like this with a wife and family of his own.

A resident came in to tell me that she was leaving the community. She and her husband were divorcing and she wanted me to know. I had grown to know her and her husband during their residency and it saddened me to know that they had decided to divorce. She sadly said, "I'm tired of it being a one way street all the time, you know?"

On the one hand I have a friend who has spent years and a lot of effort to find "the one" and would do anything to find a wife and settle down, have two kids, a  dog, a minivan in the driveway, and a nice house with the white picket fence all around it.

And on the other, another marriage fades away with the people in it no longer able or willing to try and keep their love alive.

Why do we spend so much of our time and energy looking for love - only to find then find a million and a half ways to screw it up once we do find it? Why do we promise to treat love as a two way street...then choose to make it a one way street when we're on it?

What are your thoughts?


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    Rommel Anacan

    I am a national speaker, trainer, and strategic consultant to companies and organizations. I'm also
    the president and founder of The Relationship Difference a professional and personal development company in Orange County, California.

    My passion is helping people succeed by helping them connect, communicate and engage with the people around them more effectively. 

    More about me and this blog here!

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