The Relationship Difference by Rommel Anacan
  • Home
  • About Us
    • Training & Speaking
    • Consulting
    • Your Training Department
    • Multi-Family Housing
    • Video Production Services
  • Meet Rommel
  • Speaking Samples
  • Fan Feedback
  • Contact Us

It's Our Blog!

Grab a cup of coffee, relax for a minute or two, find your happy place, read the posts and join in the conversation!

First Time Visitor?

Can't We All Just Get Along?

9/3/2014

0 Comments

 
A few days ago my wife and I had a “discussion” that was particularly illuminating and frustrating all at the same time. I realized that I was approaching a situation in our relationship in a way that I felt was respectful and thoughtful; however she revealed that my actions were not perceived as being respectful and thoughtful at all! In fact, she thought that I was being the opposite of respectful and thoughtful! This was the frustrating part!
Picture
Photo Credit: FreeDigitalPhotos.net
The illuminating part was seeing once again, just how different we really are. In my attempts to do the right thing, I ended up doing the wrong thing in her eyes. In her attempts to do the right thing, she ended up doing the wrong thing in my eyes. 

Sound familiar?

This same process not only plays out in millions of homes, it plays out everyday where we work too doesn’t it? I read a stat that said that over 60% of workplace clashes were due to “personality conflicts.” Incidentally, “personality conflicts” is a nice way to say, “I think my co-worker is a moron! Jerk! Idiot! Talks too much! Doesn’t talk enough! Is too excited! Is too dull! Smiles too much! Never smiles! Tells dumb jokes. Never has enough fun. Likes Coca-Cola! Likes Pepsi! Voted for Obama. Voted for Romney!” and on and on and on.

In other words, one of the the biggest causes of conflict in the workplace is tied into how we relate to one another! 

Let Me Breathe!

I once worked with someone who would immediately want to tell me every every detail of her weekend when I walked into work on Monday morning. Unfortunately for her, I wanted to spend Monday morning focusing on getting caught up over what happened over the weekend and prepare myself for the week ahead. So, I guess you could say we both had very different agendas! 

I would often walk in to the office with my head down (trying to avoid eye contact) and head straight into my office. When grabbing my morning coffee, I would keep my head down, walk straight to the coffee machine, avoid eye contact while waiting for my coffee, and then grab my coffee and head straight to my office, without encouraging any type of conversation on her part. 

How do you think my actions were perceived? 

I’m sure that my avoiding her didn’t do our relationship any good and in looking back, while I do wish she was more self-aware to know that Monday morning wasn’t a good time to unload about her weekend to me, I know I could have handled those situations much more effectively, so she still felt valued and cared for, while still being clear about what I needed from her. 

Both of us entered into this situation thinking that we were both right! I’m sure she couldn’t understand why I couldn’t just listen for thirty, five minutes about what was going on in her life and I couldn’t understand why she didn’t understand my need to get started on my work. In the end, we were both right and wrong. 

We all do speak different languages, don't we? And this makes creating positive and effective relationships at work not very easy! But it can be done! And it starts with realizing that your relationships are crucial to success and that everyone brings a different language to the table. We just need to start translating! 

What have you done to cultivate positive relationships at work?

______________

If you’d like more information on dealing with workplace conflicts, I encourage you to register for a webinar I’m doing with the Multifamily Insiders, Apartment All-Stars and NAA Education Institute team on Wednesday September 10 at 2pm ET! For more information or to register, click here! 

We’ll provide you and your team with great content and the webinar can be used towards continuing education credits through NAAEI. Thank you to Apartment Guide and MRI Software for sponsoring this webinar!

0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    Picture

    Rommel Anacan

    I am a national speaker, trainer, and strategic consultant to companies and organizations. I'm also
    the president and founder of The Relationship Difference a professional and personal development company in Orange County, California.

    My passion is helping people succeed by helping them connect, communicate and engage with the people around them more effectively. 

    More about me and this blog here!

    FIRST TIME HERE?

    Most Read Posts

    • How to Lose a Customer in 10 Seconds
    • Break-Up! When Change is a Great Thing
    • The Second Button-Lessons From the Famous Seinfeld Episode
    • Why People Love Southwest Airlines
    • When Do You Take a Chance on Your Dreams?
    • Communicating in Social Media
    • It's a Wonderful Movie
    • Someone to Believe in Me
    • Can I Order Some Food First? Improving the Work Environment
    • Renew, Refresh and Restore!
    • Developing a Leadership Culture



    Archives

    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    October 2014
    September 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    June 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014
    March 2014
    February 2014
    January 2014
    December 2013
    November 2013
    October 2013
    August 2013
    July 2013
    June 2013
    May 2013
    April 2013
    March 2013
    February 2013
    January 2013
    December 2012
    November 2012
    October 2012
    September 2012
    August 2012
    July 2012
    June 2012
    March 2012
    January 2012
    December 2011

Site Menu

Home
About Us

Meet Rommel 

Speaking Samples

Fan Feedback!
Blog

Contact Us

Why Us?

"...The audience was captivated by his presentation and they all left there raving about Rommel.  If you ever want to hire someone with a relatable presentation style, that can also back it up with years of experience ... Rommel is the man to do it!  No question about it….

-Marie Simpson, Director of Membership & Educational Programs – PAA Central
Copyright 2011 | The Relationship Difference | All Rights Reserved  
Photos used under Creative Commons from Jessa B.C., roland, Joits, Veronique Debord, a4gpa, Neon Tommy, Keith Allison, phoenixshade, ThinkGeoEnergy, psigrist, Tony Fischer Photography, Jeffrey Beall, permanently scatterbrained, tastybit, Chris Winters, jurvetson, DWallis, North Devon Council, gnuckx, fabbio, NicoleElocin, marragem, Andy M¢, Gage Skidmore, JohnSeb, zzpza, Luigi Rosa, Erin Costa, justinbaeder, Jeffrey Beall, Keith Allison, neil conway, devinStein, losol, wanderingone, Bludgeoner86, vasilemadalin, wjarrettc, paulhami, Shaun Greiner, DonkeyHotey